Singles Survival Guide

It’s February, and I find myself stranded in a sea of singleness. I’ve concocted a list of ways for fellow singles to survive the onslaught of flowers and frustration, cards and consternation, sweethearts and bitter memories. Enjoy!

1. Save Yourself First 

When a turbulent airplane deploys the oxygen masks, the mantra goes “put your mask on first” to ensure you don’t lose consciousness at 30,000 feet trying to help others. Before looking for that special someone who you think will “save” you from a life of loneliness, make sure your spiritual life (and life in general) is in order. Things to look out for include consistent church attendance and financial stability. Work on growing in all areas of your life before entering into a relationship, which will enrich not only your life but also your future family. 

2. Keep Moving 

While reading a recent copy of American Survival Guide, I came across an article about how quickly one’s mind can deteriorate when stranded in isolation. One of the key factors to averting crisis is to keep moving, one task at a time. Redeem the time by volunteering for local church initiatives and learning life lessons from older married couples, instead of sitting still during your prime. These opportunities will provide a wealth of experiences and interactions that liven up the single years. 

3. Don’t Drink the Kool-aid 

When lost at sea, it may be tempting to drink salt water to slake a burning thirst, but in the end, it would prove disastrous. Similarly, a relationship with impure motives will quickly attack your overall spiritual health. Take heart in knowing the God who “so loved the world” is writing your love story one day at a time. Don’t jump into a relationship of convenience to satisfy a temporary wave of loneliness.  A friend of mine who recently got engaged said it best: Wait for what’s Right so you don’t have to live with what’s Wrong. 

4. Food and Shelter 

When facing any survival situation, immediate concerns include food and shelter. Make sure to keep feeding yourself the Word of God and not relying on your friends’ social media revelations. Shelter your heart and don’t allow people to have access to areas that are reserved for more serious relationships. Maintaining clear boundaries in conversation and fellowship is key, and Joshua Harris put it perfectly: The Joy of Intimacy is the Reward of Commitment. 

5. Buddy- System 

When enduring a catastrophe, one great strategy is to assemble a team of like-minded survivors. The God who exists as a Trinity intends for us to live in community. Involvement in your local church is a healthy way to practice cultivating wholesome relationships and dealing with varieties of personalities. A strong group of friends can provide a boost of morale when we look around this month and see affection overload. 

As always, remember that you have a calling on your life, and “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion…” (Phil.1:6) It may not be our favorite holiday, but here’s hoping the Single’s Survival Guide will help you make it through this Valentine’s Day.

Be Blessed and Encouraged. 

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